Savings, Schmavings

Shh ... hear that?

That's the sound of Daylight Saving time sucking so hard that it's zapping the brain power I'd usually use to describe how hard it sucks.*

*Or something like that.

Dude. This is the second morning IN A ROW that I have been utterly and unfortunately dragging ass, from the time I peel my reluctant self from between my sheets to the time I crawl back into them, exhausted. Yesterday, my eyes popped open and I felt all rusty and fumbled for my phone and when I looked at the time I was like, "OMG!" because it was seven forty-eight, y'all. A mere twelve minutes before school started. Considering I have a.) my morning routine timed out down to the second (which isn't always to my advantage), and b.) four children to feed, dress, and wipe the crust off of, 7:48 is not an optimal time to wake up on a school morning.

Of course, all of my kids were sleeping, which made it doubly painful because there's something horribly tragic about waking. your. children. when. they. are. still. asleep. at. almost. eight. o'clock. Do you realize how often that doesn't happen?! I can probably count on one hand the number of times I've gotten to sleep past eight in the seven-plus years that I've been a mother. The boys are all early birds, even coining the eldest a nickname: Crack-of-Dawn Colin. (Seriously, scroll down and search this site for that phrase and you'll come up with no fewer than seven posts ... such as this gem.)

I ended up getting them to school only about fifteen minutes late. Which sounds impressive until I tell you that they may or may not have eaten still-frozen waffles for breakfast. But hey! They liked them.

This morning, I was only a few minutes later than usual. I would have been back on schedule, but instead was I had to drag myself from the warmth of my bed into the biting frost of the morning in order to take the dogs outside because somebody *coughCurtiscough* is also apparently having trouble adjusting to the time change and has "run out of time" to do his morning-ly dog pee duties for two mornings in a row. And because that happened later than it normally does, I still had to deal with a puddle on the floor this morning.

You just don't realize how much you rely on schedules until yours - and therefore your kids' - gets flicked off-kilter by an hour twice a year! This isn't the first time I've griped about Daylight Saving Time, but I swear it's worse this time around. Like, seriously. I don't recall having this much trouble adjusting to it since ... well, ever. There is no "springing forward" around this piece.

When I'm old, I'm planning on doing what the rest of elderly America does and relocating to someplace warmer. And I'm increasingly leaning toward Arizona or Hawaii because those are the only two states with sense enough to stay out of this time change mess! I mean, a set schedule is pretty important to an old person, right? Why else would prunes be so popular?