Poo to You!

I'll never get the chance to meet most of you in person. But for those of you I do have the privilege of meeting, please bear one thing in mind: if I give you a sweet treat that looks alarmingly like poop, it's because I'm trying to impress you. Really.

I've come to realize that I have an almost uncanny knack for creating desserts - for consumption by people other than my immediate family - which resemble feces. Seriously. I'm #1 at making things that look like #2.

Remember those cupcakes I made for the new neighbors? They looked like crap, in the most literal sense.

I don't know why, when it comes to making goodies for other people, I don't just stick to my tried-and-true recipes: the ones I've (more or less) mastered, like apple pie or chocolate chip cookies. It's like I have this weird compulsion to grandly go beyond my normal dessert repertoire and enter into delicious new territory. Only problem is ... it backfires on me. Like, always.

True to form, though, when Curtis asked me if I'd make him some kind of dessert to take to his holiday dinner at work, I decided to try making something new: chocolate-dipped peanut butter balls. Wisely, I whipped up a "test batch" of balls for home consumption first. (These thighs didn't get this size by themselves, y'all.) They were delicious, but a bit too big. So for the work party, I deduced, I should make them smaller. Bite-sized, if you will.

But what I didn't realize? Was that making them smaller would also make them look like little nuggets of poo.

So it looks like Curtis will be taking a platter of rabbit turds to work with him.

Hey, it's better than the creamed corn he took to last year's dinner.