Dear Immune System ...
Dear Immune System,
I understand the need for a vacation. I totally do. But to leave me vulnerable and ill right now, when the husband is working a weird shift for 23 days straight? Not cool, Immune System. Not cool at all.
Let me remind you that this isn't the first time you've skipped out on me. In fact, because of your lackadaisical approach to your duties, I spent 3/4 of my childhood hopped up on Amoxicillin. But I overlooked all that because for most of my adulthood, you've done what you're supposed to do. I don't get sick very often these days, and that's a good thing.
Right now, though, is a different matter. For you to go packing just as the Stomach Virus from Hell and the Horrible Cold invade my entire household? That's just wrong. And it's even more insulting that you took your little friends, a.k.a. my children's immune systems, with you on your poorly-timed sabbatical. Do you think I don't have anything better to do than clean up three little boys' barf and (extra) poop? Do you think I want to do all that when my head feels like it's going to explode from sinus pressure and my throat feels like it's lined with sandpaper?
To take a little leave of absence is one thing, Immune System, but to stay gone long enough to allow the Horrible Cold to invade the children is just ludicrous. I may no longer be doing eight loads of vomit-soaked laundry a day, but now I'm dealing with three runny noses and sore throats (and the accompanying crankiness, which is probably worse than everything else). All while feeling like crap myself, because YOU, Immune System, decided to quit protecting me with no prior notice.
So I'm calling you out. I suggest you get your low-functioning act together and start doing what you're supposed to do: keeping me from getting sick. And bring my kids' immune systems back too, because I can't afford any more damn Kleenexes.
Your Super-Tolerant Employer,
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being sick when the kids are is the worst! I had one time it was the kids sick, the husband recovering from his vasectomey and me an emergency root canal. Let me tell you, I so understand drugs now!
ReplyDeleteOh man, hope you're feeling better soon. Your last post (the pissy overalls) cracked me up. Ha!
ReplyDeleteLOL Love this post. I'm sorry you all are sick, though! (((Hugs)))
ReplyDeleteBeing sick at the same time sucks. When that happens to us, we have one saving grace. Hubster never gets sick. Although I'm sure he wishes he did sometimes, because it's his unsick self that is left to do puked on laundry and wipe noses.
ReplyDeleteI know the feeling, lady. I'm praying that my immune system is back now that I'm no longer pregnant. 'S been a looong 9 months! Hope you're feeling better STAT, and that good 'ol immunie comes back double-quick.
ReplyDeleteMy immune system always seems to crap out at the exact wrong time too.
ReplyDeleteSorry you're so sick. I hope this letter works.
ReplyDeleteYour letter, in all its funny brilliance is SURE to work. I mean really, how can that naughty little immune system withstand that pressure? Here's hoping that you're back to lollipops and sunshine VERY soon.
ReplyDeleteI hope all of you get better soon.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about the sickness.
ReplyDeleteWe just got over what I call the stomach swine flu. It was that bad. I hope you're all to feeling better soon.
I hope you feel better soon!!
ReplyDeleteAnd thank you so much for stopping by my blog and leaving such a nice comment. I really appreciate it!
Thanks for the comment love on my special SITS day.
ReplyDeleteGlad I could help with the Mystic Tan tips.
It's pretty rude of that immune system to crap out just when you need the extra help! Hope that letter gets its lazy attention and all is well ASAP!
ReplyDeleteThat really stinks! Hope you and your family get to feeling better soon.
ReplyDeleteain't that always the way?? I always get sick when it's least convenient, although, come to think of it, it's never really convenient. But still. It happens and it sucks. Hope you're feeling better soon!
ReplyDelete